Online Safety

Online safety is used interchangeably with terms such as Internet safety, cyber-safety, Internet security, online security and cyber-security. The risk of using computers, mobile phones and other electronic devices to access the Internet or other social media (SMS) is that breaches of privacy may lead to fraud, identity theft and unauthorised access to personal information.

For a child, going online may not only place their immediate emotional health at risk, but also potentially lead to physical harm. This is particularly so where little or no attention has been paid to the security of the device being used. The Internet has its share of dangers and risks for children, such as cyber bullying, stalking, or exposure to illicit materials. Criminal offenders have proved to be highly skilled at exploiting new models of communications to gain access to children, and adult-only materials can be easily accessed by children if there are no protective mechanisms in place.

While online safety is important for protecting children from dangerous and inappropriate websites and materials, this does not mean that parents should discourage their children from accessing the Internet. The challenge is to help children enjoy the benefits of going online while avoiding the risks.

Practical tips for parents to help children use the Internet

Monitor

• Talk calmly and frankly with your child and other family members about Internet activities.
• Keep the computer in a shared family area where you can monitor how long your child is online as well as the websites your child is visiting.
• Together with your child, set up some simple and fair rules about Internet use. This may include setting reasonable limits on the amount of screen time that your child is allowed.
• For older children, a written Internet use agreement with them will help to make rules clear.
• Use the History button in the browser program. It will allow tracking of the websites that your child visits.
• Find out if your child’s school has an Internet policy and how Internet safety is maintained there.
• Remember that mobile phones and other digital devices can be used to access the Internet, and that use of these devices may also need to be monitored.
• If there is a wireless connection in the house, turn it off when it is not in use.

Protect

• Explain to your child that not all information on the Internet is good, true or helpful, and that some areas are for grown-ups only and are not intended for children to see.
• Help your child identify unsuitable material by naming some things to look out for, such as sites that contain scary or rude pictures, swearing or angry words.
• Use a family-friendly Internet service provider (ISP) that provides proven online safety protocols, or ask an ISP how to source and install the right kinds of Internet security products for you and your family.
• Empower your child to use the Internet safely by showing your child safe sites and explaining why they are safe. It’s also important to educate your child on why it’s not safe to give out any personal details online.

Teach

• Focus on the positive aspects of the Internet when you are guiding your child. Spend time looking together at sites that are fun, interesting or educational.
• Encourage your child to question things on the Internet. When looking at a new site, your child could ask things like “Who is in charge of this site?”, “Have I found information, or is it just opinion?” or “Is this site trying to influence me or sell me something?”.
• Search for and use educational programs or websites specifically designed for your child’s age group.

Learn

• If you are not familiar with the Internet, start by learning about it yourself. All you need is a basic understanding to help you supervise and guide your child. You can check out community resources such as your local library, neighbourhood house, TAFE or Council of Adult Education programs. Many of these will provide classes or further information.
  

Report

See below for more advise and information sites on how to protect your family, and use the internet for the great research tool it is intended for.

Please click on this button to report abuse or receive help/advice on cyberbullying :

·         Report online child sexual exploitation
Report any inappropriate sexual behaviour towards a child.

·         Report inappropriate content
Report any Internet content which you believe is prohibited or inappropriate.

·         Report spam
Report spam to the Australian Communications and Media Authority.

·         Help and advice on cyber-bullying
Assistance on how to deal with cyber-bullying.

Note: This information is for people who live in Australia only.  For advice on reporting these issues from another country, please visit the Virtual Global Taskforce website.

Resources:
http://www.aifs.gov.au/nch/pubs/sheets/rs25/rs25.pdf

Related Articles:
Cyberbullying
Cyber-safety:Lukes-story 

Cyberbullying

Recent research shows that 14% of children in Australia suffer from cyberbullying.

Generally, the internet is a highly valuable tool for people of all ages, for instant research and answers of any kind.
However, the internet has also given a new face to an old problem – bullying. The internet allows people to bully or get revenge, without physical confrontation. This ease of use is one of many reasons why cyber bullying is growing exponentially.
Cyberbullying is any form of bullying that is carried out using technology, especially the internet or mobile phones.

Cyberbullying can include:

Using mobile phones by texting or by using a camera

Sending threatening emails or forwarding nasty emails

Setting up malicious websitesInsulting or excluding someone in chatrooms

Frequency of cyber bullying methods

Cyberbullying is different to bullying that occurs in person because:

• It can take place 24/7 meaning it can be difficult to escape

• It can reach a wider audience

• The written word and/or pictures can be permanent and there for all to see

• It can be more secretive and is less easily detected

• It can be anonymous

Tips For Dealing With Cyberbullying

Be Proactive

Don’t wait until a problem occurs. Prevention is always the best approach. Protect your phone number. Only give it to friends, and keep a note of who you’ve given it to. Consider using caller ID blocking to hide your phone number when you call someone.

Don’t give your personal information to anyone you don’t know (or don’t want to know), including your name. Similarly, don’t leave your name on your voicemail as it confirms to the person doing the bullying that they’ve called the right number.

Have regular discussions with your child about how they might respond to cyberbullying if it occurs.

Don’t Respond

Don’t reply to the bully. Responding gives the bully the ‘kick’ they’re after. But it is essential that you encourage your child to tell you or a teacher or another adult when there is something concerning them. Reassure them they will not be trouble with you if they ever do.

Suggestions for Safe Behaviour

• Keep username and passwords secret. Make passwords and security questions hard for others to guess.

• Don’t tell anyone your name, where you live or other personal details which might help them identify you.

• Only put the friends you know on your contact lists.

• Don’t respond if someone says something that is not appropriate or makes you feel uncomfortable. Leave the site immediately.

• Be careful about what you say online; misunderstandings can occur more easily because there are no non-verbal cues when communication is not face to face.

Use Technology to Protect Your Family

Block and delete the individuals who bully your child online. Save the text, images, or the website that contains the bullying.

Also talk to your mobile phone company to see if they can help. Your phone company may be able to stop certain numbers calling you. They may also be able to provide you with a new phone number. Ask them about your options.

Make sure you keep a record of what has happened - include the date and the time. Keep messages. This information can be used as evidence.

Have a Rest From Technology

Encourage your child to turn their phone or computer off sometimes. This encourages them to lead a balanced life and can give them themselves a break from contact with individuals who harass them.

Try to buffer the impact of the cyber bullying by increasing other positive experiences

• Assist the development of self-esteem and self-confidence by helping the child to develop a broader sense of themselves – highlight their strengths, reassure them that they are loved and valued in the family, encourage and support their interests

• Create opportunities for them to expand their support networks outside of the bullying setting

• Help the child experience a sense of personal power and control in other areas of life such as involving them in some decision-making at home

• Reduce the child’ focus on the bullying by increasing the amount of other enjoyable and fun things in their life.

The Law

The law is on your side. People who bully believe that mobile phones and computers are a means of taunting their target anonymously. They are wrong. It’s a criminal offence to use a mobile phone or computer to intimidate, harass or offend another person. And almost all malicious contacts can now be traced.

At Enough is Enough, we have been discussing the issue of cyber bullying with parents and teachers in the Positive Solutions Bullying Resilience Program.

The issue is exacerbated by the amount of time children are permitted on the internet without supervision. If your child has a tool to get on to wireless internet in their bedroom, such as a computer, game console, Mobile phone etc., they have access to the net 24/7, and all the issues which can come with it.

Children can spend all night watching and responding to internet conversations, worried about comments made. This type of behaviour can destroy a child with low self esteem, exclusion in the real world and sleep deprivation. Parents need to go online, discover all the new portals their children are using ie Facebook, Twitter, MySpace etc., how they work, how communication can get out of hand, and how to set limits.

Then, if the internet tool is kept in a common area of the house, the child only has the time to use it in waking hours.

They have to be careful of the content they search, or comments they make, as an adult may walk past. As a condition of the child’s internet use, parents should have all usernames and passwords, not to be given to anyone else, and parents should make their children aware they will regularly check the internet use history, simply by clicking the favourites button on the home page.

Children should be advised never to share their usernames or passwords with anyone else, as their friends at school can change at a whim, then post negative comments on the child’s behalf without the child’s knowledge or permission.

The same goes for images. If an image is taken of your child by camera or phone, it takes less than one minute for that image to be on the internet, not only to everyone in a persons address book, but in cyberspace forever.

Comments and images can have legal repercussions for the person who the image is of, and the person distributing the image – this comes under the Child Sex Offenses ACT.

Remember:

• Check out Facebook, Twitter, Club Penguin and all other chat sites- learn how to use them

• Know your child’s usernames and passwords

• Tell your child not to share their usernames and passwords with anyone else

• Keep all internet tools in common areas of the house, not in their bedroom

• Advise your children to be aware of their behaviour in any public place, most electrical devices now include a camera

• Advise your children to be very careful of what photos are taken of them

See below for more advise and information sites on how to protect your family, and use the internet for the great research tool it is intended for.

Please click on this button to report abuse or receive help/advice on cyberbullying :

·         Report online child sexual exploitation
Report any inappropriate sexual behaviour towards a child.

·         Report inappropriate content
Report any Internet content which you believe is prohibited or inappropriate.

·         Report spam
Report spam to the Australian Communications and Media Authority.

·         Help and advice on cyber-bullying
Assistance on how to deal with cyber-bullying.

Note: This information is for people who live in Australia only.  For advice on reporting these issues from another country, please visit the Virtual Global Taskforce website.

Resources:
www.parentline.org.au

Cyber Bullying - Luke's Story

Luke was an 11-year-old boy when he first came to optimistic kids. He was not at all gifted as sport however was extremely good with computers and solid academically. Even though he was not the most popular boy at school he facilitated an Internet chat room for his classmates that were much frequented in the hours after school.

Unfortunately a group of kids at school began using the chat room as a forum for cyber bullying Luke. As moderator of the chat room this placed him in a very difficult position. The chat room was outside of school hours and not directly to do with the school and yet the bullying was being perpetrated by children who attended his school. It was obvious that the situation was not going to be resolved swiftly.

Needless to say that the situation was extremely stressful for him and he needed some strategies to help him get through to the other side of this large adversity. Luke’s skills of resilience and optimism were initially very low. He tended to blame himself for the situation; in spite of the being no evidence that he had in any way upset these children. He also believed that this situation would never come under control and that he would have to give up his role as moderator and even as participant in the very chat room that he facilitated. At his worst moments he believed that he would even have to leave his school.

Through teaching him the skills of resilience and encouraging him to apply them both at home and at school he was able to cope with this difficult situation over the course of the three months that it took to resolve. Luke was taught “real time resilience” in which he was able to apply accurate resilient thoughts to challenge and replace the many and varied negative thoughts that were entering his head and controlling his feelings. In this way he was able to come up with rational alternative thoughts that reduced his level of distress to a point where he was able to get through his school day.

He was also able to see that this situation would ultimately be brought under control given a combination intervention by Optimistic Kids, the school and some supportive and assertive parents. (His own parents and some of those of the children from the chat room). Luke’s parents were also instrumental in fostering at home the resilient and positive attitudes that he was being taught by Optimistic Kids and coaching him in being more assertive with other children.

Luke’s story is more common than we would like it to be and provides a picture of a child whose school life could have gone either of two ways: either leaving school with a potential descent into depression and a target for further bullying, or being able to remain at his school and use this as an opportunity to build resilience and some of the thinking skills that would service him well into the future.

The epilogue to this story is that seven years later I received a phone call from Luke, extremely concerned about a good friend of his. Luke was studying at a university interstate, having continued through to the completion of his secondary schooling with very good marks and at his original school. In his university friend he had observed some of the old thinking patterns and behaviours that he had experienced when he was going through the cyber bullying. He was concerned that his friend was not coping well, and may end up leaving university. He wanted to know where he could get resilience training for his friend. It was extremely pleasing and reassuring to see that not only had Luke continued to use his resilience and optimism skills over the course of the seven years since I had first met him, but that he was also able to identify a potential problem in his friend and take assertive action to deal with it.

Once learnt, the skills of resilience and optimism can be used to give children positive attitudes for life.

Simon Andrews on behalf of Enough is Enough

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Enough is Enough High School Programs

Your Life - Your Responsibility (Yrs 7-12)

Years 7-9: Focus: Building resilience, dealing with bullying, accepting change

Years 10-12: Focus: Facing challenges, building personal responsibility, making a difference, staying motivated.

Using the real life story of a senseless act of violence, this session encourages students to focus on personal responsibility, overcoming adversity, facing fear, maintaining self control and building inner strength, resilience an developing leader-ship skills. Presenters share how a major traumatic experience changed the life of one man, turning personal tragedy into hope for others. Challenges young people to truly understand the meaning of living their lives to the full. Our keynote workshop/seminar, can be tailored for small groups or as a large presentation.

Call us for more information on 02 9542 4029

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To keep up to date with our news, new articles and current events connect with us on Twitter, Facebook, and our E-Newsletter.
For information about Enough is Enough Anti Violence Movement visit: www.enoughisenough.org.au

Cyber bullying

Psychologist Simon Andrews has found through his research and experience that many children benefit greatly when taught to look at situations in a more accurate and positive way. Research indicates that optimistic thinking builds resilience against depression. Please read our interview with Simon Andrews about Cyber bullying.

What do you believe cyber bullying is?
Cyber bullying is any type of bullying where technology is used as the method of delivery. It is far more intrusive than traditional school bullying because it can occur anywhere and at anytime. Children can receive threatening text messages at any time of the day no matter where they are. They can have their social networking pages smeared with untruths. Other children can impersonate them on the web or by phone, with a view to humiliating them.

Are you concerned about cyber bullying?
I am definitely concerned. It is difficult enough for children, parents and schools to deal with traditional bullying, however cyber bullying takes these unacceptable behaviours into a realm where children are the experts and adults have some catching up to do. Everyone knows that if you are having a problem with your computer then you ask the youngest person in the room to fix it for you. In the same way children, preteens and teens are also expert at the new communication technologies. This means that cyber bullies have more time and space to perpetrate their threats before they can be brought to account. In turn this means that the victims are suffering longer before adults can catch up and do something about it.

How do you think cyber bullying affects people, in particular children?
It can be more potent than being bullied in the school yard, because not only can it follow you home, it comes into your house and your bedroom. Cyber bullying comes with you to sport on the weekends and to your grandmother's house for tea. The end results include anxiety, depression, school refusal, psychosomatic complaints (nausea, stomach-aches and headaches for which there is no medical reason), and at its worst suicidal thoughts, plans or completion. The effect on school results in naturally negative, with falling grades and lower motivation for school. The effect on family life is also observable with increased irritability, more time spent in the bedroom and in being reluctant to be involved in social occasions.

How can cyber bullying be stopped?
Children, preteens and teens need to be coached in how to behave online and on their phones. If they receive a threatening message then they must not reply and should not delete it from their phone or computer in order that it can be used as evidence. All protections need to be put in place to ensure that only those people you want to have your details are able to access them. Parents need to do their best to become familiar with all of the new technologies and latest versions of these. These change rapidly and require frequent revisits to ensure that they know which application their children are using and how to actually use it...and who better to give you a lesson than your own child! They usually enjoy the chance to show Mum and Dad that they know more than them. Other means of limiting the parts of your children's lives where the cyber bullying can get to them is to limit use of mobile phones and computers to the living areas of the house and that all devices are turned off at a certain time each night.

Who is responsible for managing cyber bullying issues?
In short, we all are. The child must take responsibility to behave safely online and to report bullying immediately to parents. Parents need to do their bit to have well coached children and to be up to date with the latest applications and devices. Schools can take action for bullying within the school context. In extreme cases where physical safety or life is threatened then the police need to become involved. Cyber bullying has the power to be more potent than traditional bullying, so it demands our attention. A little bit of time spent in coaching safe behaviours and in being up to date can prevent a lot of suffering, or worse, in the future.

Simon Andrews on behalf of Enough is Enough

Twitter Warnings - Cyber Safety for Youth

Twitter is a great networking tool. It truly creates a global conversation, where anyone can provide and receive advice and input from others around the globe. However, there are some dangers with Twitter.  There are three specific warnings for everyone entering the Twitter conversation:

- Shortened URLs. Each Tweet must be no longer than 140 characters.  If people need to send a links to something on the web and their web addresses are too long, leaving no space for actual tweet, they use of URL-shortening sites. These sites act as a proxy for the "real" site, but with a much shorter name. The name itself has nothing to do with the actual content.
The danger here is that we have no indication of where we are being taken, other than the text of the tweet. Clicking on the link could result in pornography, phishing schemes, malware or any other unseemly or dangerous site. As with email, be very wary of clicking on links in Tweets that are from people you don't know well.

- Twitter Spammers. Twitter makes it easy for those who many have similar interests to find you and follow your tweets.  You post some tweets, and those who like what you are saying will find you and follow you. You don't seek out followers - they naturally find you based on what you are discussing.
There are many, however, who turn this paradigm on its head. They follow anyone and everyone - not because they want to receive updates from these people, but because they want to make these people aware of their existence. Since Twitter includes images with each Tweet, many of these Twitter spammers will use pornographic images  - thus spamming you with an image that you neither requested nor sought out.
The best we can do is to use the Twitter "block" feature, and block them from following us. Unfortunately, that means we need to:1. Know about them. 2. Know what they represent, and 3. Decide we don't want their influence on our Twitter page.4. Specifically "block" them from following us.

-Relationship of trust. Every con artist will first attempt to build a relationship of trust before scamming you. A common problem with all social networks is the relationship of trust that in inherent in these networks. If a scammer can leverage that existing relationship, it makes their job much easier.
Remember that at any time anyone can have their account compromises - it only takes someone discovering the username/password combination and they can start posting as if they were that individual. If any of your online friends ask for personal information, be wary of providing it online. Their account could have been compromised, and you may be handing your information over to a complete stranger.

Don't let these warnings prevent you from entering the global conversation, but when you do decide to join in , please do so with your eyes open to the dangers, and be vigilant in protecting your digital footprint. Be sure you are not associating with those that would do harm to your online reputation.

by Ken Knapton, author "Suber Safety"

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Our Anti-bullying programs with supporting materials address bullying issues in Primary and  High Schools including cyber bullying:
Please check our Schools Programs Page or call us for more information on 02 9542 4029.

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